The Twaddle lives on the internet, a big collection of wires and pornography. Most people look at the internet using a web browser and one hand.
Any web browser should be able to decode El Twad suitably, since it's written in standard internetese. But, pobody's nerfect and not all browsers get it right.
Firefox and other Mozilla-based browsers get lots of stuff right. Firefox is good. You should get it.
Opera also gets lots of stuff right and is a perfectly fine browser.
Don't know – El Twad HQ is not paved with Macs – but it's probably fine. Buy us a Mac and we'll tell you for definite.
Don't know – can't be arsed to get KDE; presumably good. And if not, the Open Source Faeries'll fix it up in no time.
Just ponder this little guy's brutal murder next time you use Internet Explorer
Oh, dear. Not only is IE6 donkeys' yonks old (and thus missing stuff), but it gets lots of stuff wrong too. Really, it's a mess. You have been warned.
Besides, it kills kittens. Seriously, every time you load a page in IE6, a cute little kitten is ruthlessly murdered. You wouldn't do that to one of those cuddly little guys, would you?
IE7 is only somewhat better – it's still a good few notches further down the dumbstick than either Firefox or Opera. If you must use IE, use IE7, but unless you must, don't. Probably kills puppies or something – haven't checked.
Anything made when the year started with a “1” is a definite no-no. Reading the web (or whatever you do to it) with one of those is like watching snooker on a black-and-white TV. Yeah, you can see the picture... just about.
And anyway, anything that's more than a year or two old is probably ushering nasties into your computer like rebellious Americans into “Brokeback Mountain”.
If anything goes wrong, assume it's your browser's fault and not ours.
If you can't be arsed to visit The Twaddle every five minutes in the hope that we've written a lovely shiny new article (O ye of little commitment), have your computer do it for you. Subscribe to our RSS (pronounced “arse”) feed – the address is https://gkn.me.uk/thetwaddle/feed .
The Twaddle has too much sexy to fit into one style, so we've spread it out across lots and let you pick one.
Click the pretty square (the “theme-switcher”) that lives at the right of the menu atop and abottom each page. If the page's background changes, hurrah! – keep going 'til you find one you like. If nothing happens, you missed and/or your browser's JavaScript has nipped out for a fag. In the latter case, just whistle merrily and move on – the theme-switcher's lame without JavaScript.
Once you've found a theme you like, the Twaddlebot's massive computer brain remembers it and re-applies it whenever it sees you approaching.
...OK, so the Twaddlebot doesn't have a massive computer brain (it's made of old ZX Spectrums and Commodore 64s) – it just sticks a Post-It note to the back of your screen.
Much as we'd like to take credit, it's really not our fault. Honest.
This edition published 2007-08-08
© The Twaddle MMIII—MMVII